What’s a brutha to do about ’em?
Let me break the situation down for you all, dear readers.
I’m a regular poster over at www.mikeportnoy.com/forum – the forum for fans of Mike Portnoy, the drummer of progressive metal legends Dream Theater. On there, I encountered another poster, Fee, who happened to be a) female and b) not too far away from me. So we get talking over MSN, and we discover we have a rather huge amount in common – she plays guitar, listens to a lot of the same bands I do, has a similar sense of humour, et ceterea. Oh, and that she’s hot.
Before a week passes since our first encounter, we arrange to meet in Glasgow. We do so, having lunch in a pub (me: chilli con carne, her: ceaser salad). During our noshing, she says ‘I want to go to the beach’. Initially I pass it off as a musing on her part, but it progresses to us going down to her house in Newton Mearns (posh bit in the south side of Glasgow), sticking her dog in her car and the three of us driving down to Troon to walk her dog on the beach. It’s nice, we walk down the beach then back up, talking all the way about a variety of subjects from music, volleyball (her sport of choice), martial arts (my sunday afternoon hobby of pain) and her previous boyfriend, who was by all accounts a bit of an arse. She drives me back to Stewarton and drops me off at my front door, she goes home.
We continue talking over the net and a week or two after our initial encounter she says she’s going down to Troon again that Sunday to walk her dog. “Want some company? ;-)” I ask her. “Sure.” says she. Sunday comes, she pulls up outside my house in her dad’s brand new Skoda estate (which sounds like a taxi due to its diesel engine, sparking a small running gag between us) and we scoot off to Troon again with Sam the black labrador in the boot, Dream Theater’s new Octavarium CD playing all the way. We walk the beach, talk some more, she drops me off again, and we go back to talking on the internet and occasional text message.
I’m really starting to like this girl by this time. Unfortunately, due to the asshattery of her last boyfriend, she’s aparently ‘enjoying being single’.
We arrange to meet up yet again after a while, planning to see a film, then grab some dinner afterwards and have a few choice beverages in a classy establishment. This was to take place last week. It did, but there was a few hitches – she couldn’t do dinner & drinks due to her aunt & uncle coming over that night, which her mum dropped on her that morning. Nice one, Mrs Smith. 😛
So, we go to the cinema and see Batman Begins. I give her an ad-hoc birthday present, as her birthday was yesterday and I wouldn’t see her again before it. I’d explain what I gave her, but it would require explaining a lengthy and complicated Portnoy Forum in-joke, but she seemed to like what I gave her. She even took a picture of herself with the items and posted it on the Forum, which the forumers dug. Batman Begins rocked us both, I walked her down to where she was meeting her sister, gave her a hug and we went our seperate ways. Again, we’ve been talking on the net and I’m still digging her. As far as I know, she’s still not wanting a relationship. People who have talked to us both (mutual MP.com friends) seem to think we’d be great together, which I concur with. They’re also saying I should go for it. And I’m thinking of slapping a greco-roman lip lock on her at a good opportunity, should such arise.
Some other pertinent points
* I apparently remind her of her first boyfriend, Joe, who she split up with due to her seeing him as more of a friend than a boyfriend, due to them doing more ‘friend’ things together (playing guitar, video games and stuff) rather than more romantic things
* She reckons I should be more pro-active with women ‘Here you! *MWAH!*’, in her words. 😛
* She pretty much knows I fancy her. She hasn’t knocked me back outright, but she says she isn’t sure yet wether she’d want to be with me when she’s ready for another man. I guess if she knew she’d say so. Maybe I need to make a move to help her make up her mind. 😉
So, friends, what do you reckon? Should I make a move? Or should I wait more? My concern is that if I leave it too long someone else’ll sneak in and get in there first, which seems to happen to me quite a lot, and I’m, frankly, getting sick of it.
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, posted on July 6, 2005 at 4:39 pm, filed under
Try it and see what happens. The worst she can say is no, and at least it’s all out in the open.
And er… be less Joe-like. 😉
This is a tricky one. You have obviously discussed being “together”, but making a move could backfire completely.
* If you make a move and she rejects you, it’ll spoil your friendship, which you obviously enjoy.
* If you don’t make a move, there IS the chance she’ll meet someone else, though I personally doubt that as its taken you quite some time to get this close.
IMHO, I’d do more “romantic” things with her. This way, she’ll start to see you in a different light. If she’s ready, she’ll let you know. The best relationships I have been in have all started as friends first. Definitely go out for that drink, more walks on the beach(try holding her hand, her reaction to this will give you a huge clue), sunday lunch somewhere, that kind of thing.
The signs are there to see, but I’d be wary of jumping in with both feet.
Good luck Neil :o)